about me______________
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The Jackass ChroniclesThe worm has definitely turned for you, manWell, I got busted for the "free" cable I've had for almost the past year. When I got home after work and turned it on and was greeted with a snowy screen, I fell to my knees in slo mo much like Elias when he got shot in Platoon. I'm pretty sure I even heard a little Adagio For Strings in the background.I plan on calling the brother that hooked me up last year and doubling the bribe, in hopes that he'll get out there As Fast As Possible. Now before you go judging me for not being able to live with TV, I have just 2 words to say to you all: Playoff Baseball. I can live without the reality TV and I definitely do not another to see another show that tells me that Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston have A FABULOUS LIFE, and lord knows I ceratinly do not need to ogle Carter from Trading Spaces anymore. But baseball! BASEBALL, I cannot live without. And I cannot watch these important last games in,...in,...bars. No sound, potentially some bad jukebox music and some sorority sisters carping about their Chads. Nuh uh. Can't do it. You would think that a city so into their teams would have like a Cubs bar that ALWAYS had the sound on and took the games seriously. As it stands now, there is no such bar, nor is there one for the Blackhawks. Astounding. Everyone, please pray that I can get a hold of this guy and he's still corrupt enough to accept my 200 dollars, because I swore off paying for cable last summer and this is one promise I will not go back on. The problems I've had with the cable company have caused me so much rage and stress that I had to cut it off. I can't go back. Ever. Plus, just for regular old, no-movie-channel cable is about $70 a month when you add in the tolls, surcharges and taxes this city rapes us with. Wait. Does regular old, non-digital cable even exist anymore? I don't want the big box. I have a cable running right into my TV from the wall. I don't want to have to schedule an appointment to sit around my apartment during a 4 hour window. I'm getting enraged just thinking about all of this. What do you do when you think you may possibly might potentially sorta small-ly be falling in love with someone who lives really far away and pretty much feels the same way? |
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